Monday, April 25, 2011

Where Are You? (Sarah's Song)

DISCLAIMER: The person specified in this "parody"'s title is not on my friends list.  So, if your name is Sarah, don't ask me why I wrote a song about you, because I didn't.  Unless, of course, you are that person the song describes, but it's quite unlikely she will read this.  Anyway, enjoy!

To the tune of "Everytime We Touch" by Cascada

Camp in '98, yeah, that's where you met me.
You were so extremely friendly. (To me!)
I had Scooby madness at that point in time.
Yes, a friend in you I did find!

And every time I think 'bout those memories,
I wonder where you've been and where you are now!
Are you now teaching a class?
Or do you blow glass?
Wish I could find out!
I would give you a hug if I could find you!
I will remember you 'til the day I die!
Where on this planet did you go?
I may never know!
You made me grin wide!


You were a believer,
And, now, so am I!
We may meet again when we die! (Yeah, hat's right!)
Wherever I find you, I hope we can talk!
I can't wait to tell you it all!

'Cause things have changed so much since the late '90s!
I've switched to Tori Justice; I wish she were mine!
I am a proud parodist; I write stuff like this!
No, it's not a crime!
Yeah, I read books for fun; I'm such an addict!
Movies and music are also pastimes!
What about you, though? What's your favorite show?
What's new in your life?


I can never fight those old memories!
They have me smiling; I can't let them die!
You were awesome like that; I wish we could chat!
Maybe in paradise?

[For Sarah, wherever you are, whatever you're doing.  I haven't stopped remembering you, and I hope I never do.  I will see you again one day, although it may not be on this planet.]

Friday, April 15, 2011

The Amy Adams Song

DISCLAIMER: I don't agree with everything in the movies I mention below; frankly, some of them are ones I haven't even seen. Otherwise, enjoy!

To the tune of "Absolutely (Story of a Girl)" by Nine Days

This is the story of a girl
Whose film Enchanted was loved by the whole world
She made audiences all the world over laugh
Look at that bright red hair; makes me smile!

Two-oh-oh-seven, the year!
Audiences didn't know
That before they'd seen her!
She had guest starred on Smallville,
And in Talledega with Will Ferrell!
But, that witch sent her to Manhattan!
A land where a princess hadn't a clue!
McDreamy was her savior!
He found her, married her!
Saw it; it's true!

That role made Amy what she is today!
Her career jump-started with Disney parody!
Amy Adams is most definitely a great of today!


After that, she found her way
Into Doubt and Miss Pettigrew Lives for a Day!
Some others most did not see,
Like Leap Year or that Moonlight Serenade!
Who could not love her actin'?
Singin' quite well she can also do!
If I see her, I will say, "Hey!"
Getting her autograph would be awesome, too!

No one can look like that actin' that way!
And, it all started with Disney parody!
I truly believe Amy is a great of today!

This is a story of a girl
Who is beloved by the entire world
Doubt, Leap Year, Julie and Julia?
They were great because of her!
Makes me smile!


Well, soon she will star as Miss Lois Lane!
I have zero doubts that she will do great!
Amy Adams, you are a great of today!

This is the story of a girl
Whose film Enchanted was loved by the whole world!
She made audiences all over the world laugh!
Look at that bright red hair!

This is the story of a girl
Whose pretty face is seen by the world!
And those who have seen her acting work
Do absolutely love her!


Makes me smile!

[For you, Amy Adams! You rock!]

Thursday, April 14, 2011

Don't Need Windows

DISCLAIMER: "OS X" is pronounced "o-s-ten". Also, this rewrite is based on the Glee cover. Enjoy!

Don't Need Windows
To the tune of "Bust Your Windows" by Jazmine Sullivan and Mercedes (Amber Riley) of Glee

I don't need Windows anymore!
7 and Vista have just made me sore!
OS X Snow Leopard I do adore!
People are switching to it more and more!
I don't need Windows anymore!
I'm sick and tired of those viruses!
OS X is so much more secure!
People of Microsoft, will you ever learn?

Windows used to be really good!
But, after XP, it just went kaput!
Vista is just a copy of OS X!
And, I never did care for that 7!
You see, you can't just play with people's moolah!
Promise great products and not deliver!
And, on X, I can still use my old files!
Even emulate XP, which makes me smile!
Ha, ha, ha...

I don't need Windows anymore!
7 and Vista were nothing but poor!
I will run over my Dell with my car,
'Cause I can't get 7 to do what I want!

I don't need Windows anymore! (Ha!)
Y'all should be ashamed of what you did!
After all these years, I'm done with it!
You must think I am a huge idiot!

Macs were terrible when I was a kid!
They were super slow and loved crashing!
But, that was before OS X!
And, now Windows is the stupid one!
The damage has all been done after Windows 7!
Millions of people now are leavin'!
You can sit there and my claims deny,
But, when you go bankrupt, don't wonder why!

No Windows anymore!
Apple is better, yes, by far and large!
I don't care at all what people say!
I will use my Mac happily and proudly!
Yeah, I love it! (Oh, you love it?)
Yes, you know it! (Oh, we know it?)
I'm not sorry! (You're not sorry?)
Yes, I love it! (We should try it!)
Windows is so very sorry; I'm done with it!
(You like Mac? We should try it!)
I'm not sorry, no, no, ohhh!
(You're not sorry!)
7's a pain!
(Yes, it's a pain!
We are switching!)
People who think Macs are the worst
Obviously haven't given OS X its turn!
But why is Microsoft still trying
With all that stupid, inane advertising?
Oh, oh, that stuff's just so baby!
All that is, all that is just so baby!

Hey, hey...
This one's for you!
Just hear me:
You don't need Windows anymore!

Saturday, April 2, 2011

Yes, I am a bibliophile...but I am not a book collector.

Yes, I know; that's a word you don't hear every day. Simply defined, a bibliophile is a lover of books. As anyone who pays attention to my online postings, either on Facebook or on here, knows that I post about them quite frequently. I often go to yard/garage sales, library sales, thrift stores and used bookstores in my area to find new ones. However, I don't usually hold on to them that long; once I'm finished with a book, I either trade it in to one of the used bookstores in my area, or donate it to the library where I volunteer.
That right there makes me unable to honestly call myself a book collector. Some people collect things such as books, figurines, or cards and then let them sit there and collect dust. I never did understand that myself, even when I was a kid. I still remember when some friends who lived in my neighborhood back in the late '90s had some Scooby-Doo comic books that they wouldn't let me read, despite the fact that I was fanatical about "those meddling kids" back then. Why wouldn't they let me? Simply because they needed to be kept mint if they were going to be worth anything. Even with things of my own, my Beanie Baby collection (which is now thankfully gone) was all dirty and beat up because I broke the first rule of Beanie collecting: They were not to be played with. I never saw the point of letting them sit around, so I played with them like crazy, and it ended up decreasing their value.
Some people might wonder if I'm a book dealer. Well...not exactly. The ways I specified above (trade-ins to used bookstores, donations to the library) are usually the only ways I get rid of books. Sometimes, my family will have a yard sale, and I'll put my books out there...but, even though I always sell right many, I'm usually left with quite a few after the sale is over, and pretty much all of the remaining literature ends up at one of those places. I seldom buy books just to re-sell them; the only time I do that is if I find a deal where you can have a whole bag of books for only a buck or two, and, although that's happened, it's quite rare. I almost always buy what interests me, not what I think will interest the general public. I can see why some people buy and re-sell things; if done correctly, it can be quite lucrative. Where I live, it seems like buying and re-selling is a common practice; I still remember back in late 2000, when the PS2 came out and there were at least seven or eight different ads for them in my local paper's Classified section, all of which were selling one for more than the MSRP. You might think only an idiot would buy a brand-new video game system from one of those people, but, back then, those things were in such high demand, people would have been glad to pay the higher price, because it would put a big smile on their kid's face that Christmas. That doesn't make me want to buy and re-sell things myself, but I still do understand why some people do it.
Any comments?